The other night I found an old file folder on my computer that had pics of Hadley when she was just a baby. The emotions that rushed through me were incredible. Some of the moments I remembered and others I didn't remember so well. Reviewing the pics got me to thinking that I hope she is having a good childhood. I hope I am providing what she needs psychologically and emotionally to grow into a strong, confident young woman. The other day she told me "You're a good Daddy." I asked her why and her responses surprised me somewhat. All of her responses dealt nothing with physical things or objects--they were things I do for her and with her.
I know there is more to the "equation," but I feel that one of the most significant responsibilities you can help develop in your child is a good sense of self-worth. I'm not talking about dreams of grandeur and over-the-top syrupy positive thinking, but a sense of "I'm OK with who I am" type of feelings. It's important to talk positively to your children. Yes, there are times when you need/must be constructive, but you don't need to do it in a mean tone. I'm always dumbfounded when I hear parents calling their children stupid or saying derogatory and insensitive things to them at a store. If they say these things in public, what do they say in private?
Our kids need support and to know that you believe in them regardless of a specific (or preferred) outcome. Ultimately, I feel how we talk to our children translates into how they talk to themselves. Self-talk is so vital. What we say to ourselves over-and-over burns itself into your brain.
Think about what you say to yourself and to others. They leave a ripple...
(If you have girls, consider Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters. It's a powerful book.)
